26th of May 2007 (wtf)

You asked if i wanted a shoe,
I replied, "yes dad. I do
but ask Mum's permission first,
cause she wants me to study"

"Go lor since he doesn't want to study"
In a very pissed tone she replied,
well, i was already very depressed that day.
And she just had to let anger find a way.

So i got so pissed,
cause before that i told her i'll study soon,
and didn't meant to make her angry,
so i yelled, you came and got pissed too.

So it all started like this,
you got so angry you called me a bastard.
You almost punched me but miss.
And because mum fended me, you didn't beat me.

Its been a long time since i cried.
But as u saw the tears,
your anger u tried to hide,
then you tried to hug me...

...i know its against my personality,
to ever scold a vulgarity,
but what the fuck, its the only way to describe reality.
and fuck when i cry, i don't need your sympathy.

So i pushed your hands away,
and stormed through the door in dismay.
And before i entered the lift,
i saw your tears, filled with grief.

Since i cried, its been years.
I left with a pen and paper,
and wrote this with tears:

I hope at home we'll reconcil,
And be once again a caring family.
For it breaks my heart to see you like that.
And yours too, to see me in solarity.

And once again i'll be in your keep.
That if tonight i shall ever sleep.
I'm not afraid to never wake.
For you'll know in heaven, your loving son would wait.